Mind the gap

Have you ever set your heart on moving up a lesson level or jumping higher at a comp only to be told you’re not ready yet? Whether you’re starting to learn to ride or out competing most weekends, the gap between your expectations (what you believe will happen) and reality (what actually happens) can leave you feeling disappointed or frustrated. 

But we’re here to help you set realistic expectations so you can enjoy your riding journey! 

The fairytale formula

The story of Goldilocks and the three bears might just seem like a silly fairytale to you – after all, Goldilocks was ever so fussy – but she taught us one valuable thing, the idea of something being just right. 

When expectations are too high, you can feel…

• pressure to do well
• anxious
• like you’re not good enough 

When expectations are too low, you can feel…

•  like you’re underachieving
• there’s no point in trying
• embarrassed

But when expectations are ‘just right’ you…

• feel inspired and confident
• set and achieve realistic goals
•  enjoy and see the progress you’re making

Perfect expectations

Follow our five steps to setting expectations that are just right for you…

1. Keep it reel

A lot of things online are filtered and sometimes totally fake, so don’t believe everything you see. In general, we only see the best bits of someone else’s life on social media, which give us unrealistic expectations. 

2. Remember you’re one of a kind

Think about how different all the horse and pony breeds are. Their sizes, needs, energy requirements and strengths and weaknesses all differ and the same goes for you. Every rider has their own set of challenges, so comparing yourself to others isn’t always helpful.

3. Talk about it

Chat to an adult about your expectations because their hopes for you might be different to your own. Maybe they want you to enjoy happy hacking but you want to bring home rosettes from comps, or vice versa! Be open about what you want from your time in the saddle so you can bridge the gap between what you and they expect. 

4. Set goals and watch your confidence soar

When you believe in yourself, you’ll be better equipped to deal with the challenges you face. Unrealistic expectations can drain confidence and make you doubt yourself. Instead, focus on setting goals that give you a clear direction and purpose.

5. Celebrate every little thing.

Remember, trying your best and putting in effort are achievements in themselves! Riding isn’t all about winning or perfect progress – it’s about spending time doing what you love, so make sure you celebrate every positive step.

Power to change 

The journey of learning to ride is filled with highs and lows. It’s not a race to the finish line, but a chance for you to learn and grow while doing something you enjoy. 

Think about it as if you were approaching a jump – too fast, slow or wonky and the whole thing is likely to be a disaster. But when you change your approach, you have the power to change the outcome. So by getting your expectations just right and understanding what you’re good at and need to work on, you’ll be on your way to becoming a better and more confident rider.